PAOLO JAVIER

Googlism For My Wimbledon Love

1

you were delivering a single
you were about to get into the rhythm, &
         your weight was on your back foot
when you demonstrated that beauty knew no bounds

2

you were clearly the 1
you were clearly playing better than anyone
you were the reigning Open champion
        of the heart’s floodlit court


3

you were the value
you were #1 among the constellations,
        & Venus #2


4

I always felt that you were beautiful in the classical sense
        of the Ur
you were a young woman who’s always faced the challenges of life with cerebral poesy
you were a sweet 14 year old
you were 2
you were 24
you were a born survivor
you were otherwise known online as Saint Clara

5

once, during our first month together, on the last leg of an unplanned trip into the Valley
you drove me to a beautiful rented home in Rocky Point
situated at a short distance from Milan
located in Manzanillo
one of Chile’s oldest cities next to
one of Chile’s oldest towns

it was a city of old world charm then
it was a city with a population of just over a hundred
& you were their memory resident

6

you were a flame
you were a pleasant sea
you were the word for mermaid in the Philippines
you were a pair of mango-juice stained fingertips
you were a birthday backrub & a lingering kiss
you were chocolate


7

then one day you died in my arms in a dream
where I got usurped by a powerful player
        with a killer serve
who was always much more gregarious
who was sure to impress anyone upon arrival

now this powerful player
is neither 24 years old nor attends Juban Junior High School in Tokyo
is not as good as Venus once could have been
is not a black smoke British shorthair born May 18
is not your fabulous imported shire mare
is way behind in any of those categories compared to the players with which he will
        surely be judged in time

I was determined to drive out this interloper
        & his household of manservants

you were no longer a welcome guest in my house


8

you were hurt, but
you were unbeaten, &
because of that

9

you’re probably off right now apartment-hunting in the margins of Brooklyn
        to be near him


10

& you will serve
& you will volley
& you will deliver it to me
        blow-by-blow

& these last three are the only things about you
I would ever truly want anyone here to know

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